First off, the geek in me must proudly proclaim that there are 42 days left until my wedding! If you don't understand why that is important .... pick up a book!
Second thing on the agenda would be the surreal feeling of getting married. As I sent David out today to get the comforter from the laundry room I realized, for whatever reason, that we were going to be getting married! I do not know if I have yet mentioned this, however, several years ago I spent a good year being completely unable to wrap my head around the idea that I was dating him. I blame this on us having been best friends for so long. In fact early in our relationship I'd find myself missing my high school friend on msn. I would be sitting on the sofa beside David and wondering what David was up to lately. Of course it was more of a feeling than an actual inquiry but it was a very real feeling. The only comparison I can give can only be appreciated by parents. When your child grows from a baby to a toddler or from a newborn to a baby you know it's the same child but a part of you misses the other child they used to be as though you have lost the first child and this is a second. You know in your heart they are one in the same but they are also so different that there is a part of you that goes to that crib wondering what happened to your baby.
Fortunately I never had to truly mourn for my friendship with David as we have always and still are friends first. It matters not what the circumstances he is and always will be my best friend. I go to him for everything and have a strong rule with friends, don't ever tell me anything I'm not allowed to tell him unless it is a surprise for him. For as much as I don't necessarily run to him with every detail of my life or my friends lives I keep no secrets from him for David is my best friend and the love of my life.
Alas, for that first year I would randomly say, "I'm dating David!" aloud to no one in particular. I'm glad David never found this offensive although at first he found it confusing. What was so strange about dating him. I of course explained to him and being that he knows me so well he understood. Lately, I have had similar thoughts regarding marrying him. I will be standing there at some moment in my day, perhaps folding his boxers, perhaps putting his oatmeal packet into the recycling (because he always forgets to do that) and for an instant my mind flashes from age 10 until now and WHAM I say, "I'm marrying David!!!" I guess it's like I instantly say aloud to no one in particular, "if you had asked me when I was 10, 13, 17 any age before 22 if I'd be marrying David and I would have scoffed at you. He's my best friend, we're just friends." I'd have likely msn'd him that night and said, "Oh Em Gee you will not believe what my neighbor asked me today!" we'd have laughed, he'd have joked "What's so bad about marrying me?" and I'd have told him, "oh shut up!" he'd have likely responded in some pervy fashion and the conversation would have digressed.
Lastly on the topics today is the movie pick of the day. It's not exactly last on the conversation topics but it is related to the last one. Tonight's movie was Confessions of an American Bride I just realized as I typed that title that it is similar to my own blog title today. Not planned, happy accident.
Not a great movie as it was made for TV. However, the storyline was sweet, funny and put together nicely. If only they had a budget and could have bought some nice actors they might have had something. They nailed your standard bridal problems and bridal feelings pretty nicely. Of course not every bride cheats on her groom as was the case in this story but still, for the most part it was pretty bang on. I did laugh though and said to David, "I hate movies like this!"
David - "Why?"
Me - "Because this *gestures to scene* raises the romance expectation to completely unlikely heights. No guy is ever going to do that!!!"
It's funny because the date scene I was referencing was more romantic than the proposal scene. Yet the proposal scene leads to my problem. Worse yet, my problem is a little personal. I'm not ashamed of it. Audience just might be a little sensitive to it. To remove all chance that you can blame me for reading further while still increasing your curiosity I'm going to go ahead and say that the problem is of a sexual nature and that I'm going to put it under the blanket where it's safe from accidental site.
To save my hubby-to-be's ego though I can assure you it's not THAT type of sexual problem. Oh no! Anything but that sort of problem. No.... this a problem of traditional proportions... very traditional!
You have been warned, and perhaps you have become curious but mostly you have been warned!
Alright, you really want to read this?! Really?! Are you sure... there are no more chances to turn back, this is it.
It's really not that big a deal, at least I didn't think it would be. Years and years ago when I was 16 I had decided that when I got engaged in my future I would cease having sex until my wedding night. Fortunately for myself and my hubby-to-be I decreased this to only 3 months before the wedding rather than the entire engagement. That's right, this means we have not had sex since our anniversary April 23. We will be hitting our two month mark in 2 weeks and it feels like centuries!
Of course I'm not a sadistic crazy person, we have not ceased all ... erm... communication. Just that one big step. The idea remains that I want our wedding night to be incredibly special. I even rationalized, "We have a kid, we barely have sex anyway." Yeah, turns out I grossly underestimated just how often "barely" is!! When I made this goal I had convinced myself that we would not even notice until nearly 2 months in and by then we'd be halfway there anyway. I was so terribly wrong. Not even 2 weeks in and I was starting to go nutty.
3 weeks in there were nice smelling men walking past me and I wanted to run home to my man. One month in and I was starting to lose sleep. 5 weeks in and I'm sleeping again but now there are these annoying dreams. Now, here I am, 6 weeks in and 6 weeks out. There have been 6 weeks without answering that call...more like a scream! There are only 6 weeks left to go! Halfway there! I think that I shall lose my mind! Anything that even hints towards sex drives me over the edge of insanity. Or movie pick last night, In & Out, mentioned someone having 3 testicles. Just the word "testicles" made my eyes go wide! That's not even that sexy of a word! Some nights, for the first time since I was 18, I have actually had to go to bed with extra clothes on because I'm scared I might answer natures crying call in my sleep. Mostly a joke there but in all seriousness...... 6 more weeks seems like forever!
What does this have to do with tonight's movie? That b*tch had sex so often and with so many sensual scenes!! Okay, so maybe it was only 4 times with 2 guys and only 3 of the 4 sex scenes were sensual. But they were so sensual. Hands dragging over bodies, sweat, kissing, close-ups...hot hot hot!
If any other bride ever decides to abstain from sex before her wedding night I will certainly applaud her but I will encourage her to make it only 6 weeks before the wedding. Really that's all you need! Turns out 12 weeks is just plain nutty.
I've been answering my cravings with random things. Movies, junk food, cleaning. Oh man I have not been so intent on cleaning since my last big fight with David. Rage makes me clean, boy does it make me clean. Apparently so does abstaining! Answer to a clean house, frustration of any variety it would seem.
<3 your sexually tense hippie bride
Second thing on the agenda would be the surreal feeling of getting married. As I sent David out today to get the comforter from the laundry room I realized, for whatever reason, that we were going to be getting married! I do not know if I have yet mentioned this, however, several years ago I spent a good year being completely unable to wrap my head around the idea that I was dating him. I blame this on us having been best friends for so long. In fact early in our relationship I'd find myself missing my high school friend on msn. I would be sitting on the sofa beside David and wondering what David was up to lately. Of course it was more of a feeling than an actual inquiry but it was a very real feeling. The only comparison I can give can only be appreciated by parents. When your child grows from a baby to a toddler or from a newborn to a baby you know it's the same child but a part of you misses the other child they used to be as though you have lost the first child and this is a second. You know in your heart they are one in the same but they are also so different that there is a part of you that goes to that crib wondering what happened to your baby.
Fortunately I never had to truly mourn for my friendship with David as we have always and still are friends first. It matters not what the circumstances he is and always will be my best friend. I go to him for everything and have a strong rule with friends, don't ever tell me anything I'm not allowed to tell him unless it is a surprise for him. For as much as I don't necessarily run to him with every detail of my life or my friends lives I keep no secrets from him for David is my best friend and the love of my life.
Alas, for that first year I would randomly say, "I'm dating David!" aloud to no one in particular. I'm glad David never found this offensive although at first he found it confusing. What was so strange about dating him. I of course explained to him and being that he knows me so well he understood. Lately, I have had similar thoughts regarding marrying him. I will be standing there at some moment in my day, perhaps folding his boxers, perhaps putting his oatmeal packet into the recycling (because he always forgets to do that) and for an instant my mind flashes from age 10 until now and WHAM I say, "I'm marrying David!!!" I guess it's like I instantly say aloud to no one in particular, "if you had asked me when I was 10, 13, 17 any age before 22 if I'd be marrying David and I would have scoffed at you. He's my best friend, we're just friends." I'd have likely msn'd him that night and said, "Oh Em Gee you will not believe what my neighbor asked me today!" we'd have laughed, he'd have joked "What's so bad about marrying me?" and I'd have told him, "oh shut up!" he'd have likely responded in some pervy fashion and the conversation would have digressed.
Lastly on the topics today is the movie pick of the day. It's not exactly last on the conversation topics but it is related to the last one. Tonight's movie was Confessions of an American Bride I just realized as I typed that title that it is similar to my own blog title today. Not planned, happy accident.
Not a great movie as it was made for TV. However, the storyline was sweet, funny and put together nicely. If only they had a budget and could have bought some nice actors they might have had something. They nailed your standard bridal problems and bridal feelings pretty nicely. Of course not every bride cheats on her groom as was the case in this story but still, for the most part it was pretty bang on. I did laugh though and said to David, "I hate movies like this!"
David - "Why?"
Me - "Because this *gestures to scene* raises the romance expectation to completely unlikely heights. No guy is ever going to do that!!!"
It's funny because the date scene I was referencing was more romantic than the proposal scene. Yet the proposal scene leads to my problem. Worse yet, my problem is a little personal. I'm not ashamed of it. Audience just might be a little sensitive to it. To remove all chance that you can blame me for reading further while still increasing your curiosity I'm going to go ahead and say that the problem is of a sexual nature and that I'm going to put it under the blanket where it's safe from accidental site.
To save my hubby-to-be's ego though I can assure you it's not THAT type of sexual problem. Oh no! Anything but that sort of problem. No.... this a problem of traditional proportions... very traditional!
You have been warned, and perhaps you have become curious but mostly you have been warned!
Alright, you really want to read this?! Really?! Are you sure... there are no more chances to turn back, this is it.
It's really not that big a deal, at least I didn't think it would be. Years and years ago when I was 16 I had decided that when I got engaged in my future I would cease having sex until my wedding night. Fortunately for myself and my hubby-to-be I decreased this to only 3 months before the wedding rather than the entire engagement. That's right, this means we have not had sex since our anniversary April 23. We will be hitting our two month mark in 2 weeks and it feels like centuries!
Of course I'm not a sadistic crazy person, we have not ceased all ... erm... communication. Just that one big step. The idea remains that I want our wedding night to be incredibly special. I even rationalized, "We have a kid, we barely have sex anyway." Yeah, turns out I grossly underestimated just how often "barely" is!! When I made this goal I had convinced myself that we would not even notice until nearly 2 months in and by then we'd be halfway there anyway. I was so terribly wrong. Not even 2 weeks in and I was starting to go nutty.
3 weeks in there were nice smelling men walking past me and I wanted to run home to my man. One month in and I was starting to lose sleep. 5 weeks in and I'm sleeping again but now there are these annoying dreams. Now, here I am, 6 weeks in and 6 weeks out. There have been 6 weeks without answering that call...more like a scream! There are only 6 weeks left to go! Halfway there! I think that I shall lose my mind! Anything that even hints towards sex drives me over the edge of insanity. Or movie pick last night, In & Out, mentioned someone having 3 testicles. Just the word "testicles" made my eyes go wide! That's not even that sexy of a word! Some nights, for the first time since I was 18, I have actually had to go to bed with extra clothes on because I'm scared I might answer natures crying call in my sleep. Mostly a joke there but in all seriousness...... 6 more weeks seems like forever!
What does this have to do with tonight's movie? That b*tch had sex so often and with so many sensual scenes!! Okay, so maybe it was only 4 times with 2 guys and only 3 of the 4 sex scenes were sensual. But they were so sensual. Hands dragging over bodies, sweat, kissing, close-ups...hot hot hot!
If any other bride ever decides to abstain from sex before her wedding night I will certainly applaud her but I will encourage her to make it only 6 weeks before the wedding. Really that's all you need! Turns out 12 weeks is just plain nutty.
I've been answering my cravings with random things. Movies, junk food, cleaning. Oh man I have not been so intent on cleaning since my last big fight with David. Rage makes me clean, boy does it make me clean. Apparently so does abstaining! Answer to a clean house, frustration of any variety it would seem.
<3 your sexually tense hippie bride
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